Saturday, May 31, 2008
Disappointedi cant believe tt so many ppl disappointed me at once...
i told told a few ppl abt this pageant... ppl whom i tot was my close frens n i hoped for them to be there for me... but i guess.. i was juz being stupid... i tot lishi was the only one who will forget... i din believe tt even lynn forgot.. so i guess... ya.. wadeva..
and i cant believe tt u will go do it behind my back.. itz not tt u din tell me abt it that makes me angry... if u din tell me i will juz be sad... wad makes me really angry is tt u actually lied to me...
this juz proves tt u cant rely on anyone... i dun even noe who to trust anymore...
i juz wish tt people will juz stop breaking their promises to me... promises are not meant to be broken.. i dun understand y would u promise sth tt u already noe u wun do... y do all of u lyk to do it?
i cant believe tt tml i still have to go on stage and pretend to smile and be happy... when inside.. i'm breaking apart...
My World. My Life. My Rules.
xoxo nikki
1:03 AM
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
I'm Sorry!!i juz finally go and read faifai and sze yan and lynn's blog. and i realised that i have really neglected my frens!! i'm such a bad fwen!! faifai posted in feb that i have neglected and only now then i read it!!! and sze yan...i haven contacted her for lyk so long and have no idea wad is goign on in her life now! and lynn... gosh... i've been denied access to her blog... hahhaha...
i juz asked lynn and she said that she dun blog often too.. =(
anyway... i'm so sorry faifai and sze yan... i promise to put more effort in our fwenship!! >.<
oh well... maybe i will win the MSW and i wun have to work anymore and i can have more time to throw ard and i can go out with u guys more... now my life only has 3 things which are school work and baby.. =( i wan some ME time too!!! i guess i only get them in my dreams... =(
My World. My Life. My Rules.
xoxo nikki
9:44 PM
Me??? Semi Finalist???OMG!!! i'm in MSW!!! ok la... juz a semi finalist... so weird! how come i got in? itz lyk.. weird la.. all the girls there were so pretty!! cuz now i'm in i dun think MSW is such a big deal anymore... cuz a girl of my calibre can get in so i mustnt be some amazing thing afterall...
super stressed out... how can compete with those girls? they are all tall with good figures and they are models! i think i juz go there throw face only... i will look so short and ugly and stupid next to them!!
haiz haiz haiz... itz this saturday... wish me good luck!! whoever that still reads my pathetic blog... hahaha
My World. My Life. My Rules.
xoxo nikki
9:24 PM
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Who I Was...i wish i could go back to who i was... the one who juz din care... i wish everyone would juz think tt i'm a horrible person and leave me alone... my biggest mistake was to ever open myself up to anyone... to ever tink that i would be able to find my own happy ending... tt someone actually cared.. tt i could for once be the first in someone's life... not second or third or even first with someone else.. i juz wanted to be someone's one and only.. i din realise tt the more u care abt someone.. the more u show tt u care for tt someone.... the more likely u will be taken for granted... i once tot tt i found tt person.. the person who will be there for me no matter wad.. the person who will at the very least trust me and care for me..
maybe i'm juz too demanding... i really hate myself... i wish tt i can simply dun care...
wadeva happened to the girl who believed tt she would rather hurt everyone in the world rather than let someone hurt her once? she may not be the happiest person on earth.. but at least she wasnt hurt by the pp; she cared for the most...
my biggest mistake was to have ever trusted or hoped... or even to have ever loved
My World. My Life. My Rules.
xoxo nikki
5:58 PM
Who I Was...i wish i could go back to who i was... the one who juz din care... i wish everyone would juz think tt i'm a horrible person and leave me alone... my biggest mistake was to ever open myself up to anyone... to ever tink that i would be able to find my own happy ending... tt someone actually cared.. tt i could for once be the first in someone's life... not second or third or even first with someone else.. i juz wanted to be someone's one and only.. i din realise tt the more u care abt someone.. the more u show tt u care for tt someone.... the more likely u will be taken for granted... i once tot tt i found tt person.. the person who will be there for me no matter wad.. the person who will at the very least trust me and care for me..
maybe i'm juz too demanding... i really hate myself... i wish tt i can simply dun care... wadeva happened to the girl who believed tt she would rather hurt everyone in the world rather than let someone hurt her once? she may not be the happiest person on earth.. but at least she wasnt hurt by the ppl she cared for the most...
my biggest mistake was to have ever trusted or hoped... or even to have ever loved
My World. My Life. My Rules.
xoxo nikki
5:12 PM
