Saturday, August 05, 2006
Who I Am...sometimes i wonder if i turned time back to 8 years ago when i found out that u lied to me... would i be who am i today? perhaps my life would have changed completely.. i would not have been a trusting person if u had failed to lie to me... then wad would my life be lyk? if u... my first best fren were an honest person then i would probably had been an innocent person and continued trusting everyone in my life instead of scruntinizing them carefully b4 trusting anyone at all.. or perhaps it is with the one who forced me to see the truth.. if u had let me carry on my ignorance then i wouldnt have to worry abt ppl hurting me... budden if u haven i would probably have been hurt even more the next time.. karma... how irritating... all the wad ifs... if it had not happened lyk tt... then perhaps i would treat everything in my life as a gamble... and throw so much away... then i would force myself to grow up so quickly... and be so careful in everything... so afraid to make desicions in case it is the wrong one and it would be my fault.. honestly i am so tired... all the perhaps... argh... i am so not satisfied with my life... all the things i could do differently... but honestly wads the point of thinking abt all these? zzzzz... take life as it is ba... no matter how sucky it is its ur life... and there are nice ppl ard who care... loving u all who cared for me... geniune or not u gave me support at the time i needed it...
My World. My Life. My Rules.
xoxo nikki
12:03 PM
